Collaborative Divorce Compatibility Tool

Questions

I believe it is important that our children maintain a strong and healthy relationship with both parents.

I am willing to try to see things from my spouse's point of view to achieve the best possible outcome.

10.

I believe it is possible for my pouse and me to restore enough trust in each other to achieve a successful outcome.

11.

I am willing to commit myself fully to resolving the issues by working towards common interests.

12.

It is important to me that my spouse and I maintain a respectful and/or effective relationship after the divorce.

13.

I am afraid of how my spouse may react if I told him/her/them what I really feel about the issues we will be dealing with in this divorce.

16.

Which of the following best describes your relationship with your partner?

Divorcing/separating and living apart

Divorcing/separating but still living together

Already divorced/separated

Never married and used to live together

Never married, never lived together

17.

What process(es) have you been involved in to date? Check all that apply.

Nothing formal; we have only talked with each other

Court application - once

Court application - more than once

Mediation - successfully

Mediation - no success

18.

What process(es) have you used to assist with disagreements about parenting?

Nothing formal; we have only talked with each other

Court application - once

Court application - more than once

Mediation - successfully

Mediation - no success

19.

How comfortable are you being in the same room with your partner, discussing difficult issues?

Comfortable

Difficult, but we can do it with some support or facilitation

Uncomfortable - I can't express myself or don't get a chance to talk when we have difficult conversations

20.

How well do you and your partner cooperate?

We generally cooperate well

We cooperate some of the time

We do not cooperate well

Cooperation is almost always impossible

No contact or cooperation is possible

21.

How well do you and your partner communicate?

We generally communicate well

We can communicate some of the time

We do not communicate well

Communication is almost always impossible

We do not communicate

22.

How important is the other parent to the welfare of your Child/ren?

No children

Somewhat important. S/he has some value, but also some problems/limitations as a parent

Important. S/he has some valuable things to offer as a parent

Very important. S/he has many valuable things to offer as a parent

Not important. S/he has little to offer. There are problems or deficits as a parent

Very unimportant. S/he has nothing to offer as a parent

23.

How are your overall levels of communication and cooperation?

We communicate and consider the other person's opinions and options

We have minimal communication and we don't work at cooperating

Our communication tends to have a lot of conflict and is very positional

We do not communicate at all

24.

How would you describe your level of trust in your partner?

I trust my partner in all matters of importance

I trust my partner sometimes, but not always

I do not trust my partner at all. I need supporting evidence to trust anything my partner says/does

25.

How would your partner describe his/her/their level of trust in you?

Trusts me in all matters of importance

Trusts me sometimes, but not always

Little or no trust in me

26.

Are there matters that may be relevant to your dispute that you do not wish to share with your partner?

No, I am willing to share everything relevant

l am concerned about the reaction if some information is shared, but am willing to work on a process for sharing information

I see withholding vital information as an important strategy in negotiation and would be reluctant to disclose everything right away

27.

During your relationship, how would you describe the level of trust between you and your partner?

Trust was an important part of our relationship

We were sometimes challenged with trusting each other

Inability to trust was consistently an issue in our relationship

28.

Have you ever read private emails, journals or letters of your partner's, listened into or taped phone conversations or taped settlement discussions, without your partner's knowledge? Has your partner ever done this to you?

Never

Seldom, and more than a year ago

Frequently or recently

29.

How important do you consider it to be that you and your partner be able to have a relationship with trust in the future?

Important. Our continuing relationship matters to me

Not very important, as long as we have a business-like relationship

Don't care at all about afuture relationship with my partner

30.

Are any of the following items of specific concern in your situation?

31. What is your worst fear about your divorce?

32. What is your greatest hope about your divorce?

33. How do you think your spouse would answer those questions?

34. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate the overall cooperation and communication between you and your spouse?
1 = poor, 10 = excellent

35. What does conflict look like in your home?

36. If you and your spouse have a disagreement, how is it resolved?

37. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate the level of trust you feel in your spouse?
1 = virtually impossible, 10 = completely trust

38. How do your parenting styles compare?

39. On a scale of 1-10, what is it like to be in a room alone with your spouse?
1 = extremely uncomfortable, 10 = completely comfortable

40. Do you have any concerns about negotiating with your spouse in the same room?

41. What needs to be in place to make you feel safe to say what you need to say?

42. How is money handled in your family?

43. How are financial decisions made?

44. Any pressing issues that need to be addressed at first meeting?

45. Is there anything else you would like us to know that is relevant to helping you choose the right process?

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Collaborative Divorce Compatibility Tool

Discover Your Path with Our Collaborative Divorce Compatibility Tool

Questions